Cheap Seats

I began playing basketball in 5th grade. And I was horrible. Totally confused by the rules and plays and where to shoot the ball and even how to get the ball up high enough to make a shot. Thankfully, my dad bought a basketball hoop and I practiced in the driveway rain or shine. The boys let me play at recess with them and I came into 6th grade believing I was going to one day play DI college basketball. My parents were my biggest support and cheerleaders and signed me up for skills camps & travel teams. We fundraised when necessary and ball was life!

I say this to highlight the idea of being coachable. That is what I was told at every camp. “Coaches want someone who is coachable.”

TOTALLY. Yes, be flexible. Be able to receive criticism and adjust. A coach leads the team, cares for its best interest and is with the team in the ugly and the moments of celebration!

However, I am from a small town and was born to two very well known parents. I quickly became someone most people knew of. AND someone everyone had an opinion about. I played well, they were ecstatic! Newspapers were handed to me throughout the day for my keepsake box. We lost… then came the input, ideas and ‘coaching’. By this time I had learned subconsciously that every coach wanted something different, as did every spectator. Still young and wanting to please everyone, I didn’t know how to separate it! I would get so frustrated and my narrative turned to ‘I can’t do what they’re saying! Don’t they get it! They’re not out there’ rather than being able to smile and let it go.

And here I am, 11 years later as a new mama. Guess what! Everyone has an opinion. The difference between then and now is being able to identify those in the cheap seats, and those whose counsel I have invited and asked for. AND even then, being comfortable in the fact that I have the final say. My identity is not threatened, my relationships are not threatened.

So, this is a celebration post! Of growth and encouragement. Even back then, I knew that they weren’t out there on the court with me, and yet I didn’t have the ability to understand that that was enough in itself to disqualify their input. Now with that understanding and a HUGE increase in trust in myself, I honor who I have been in uncertainty and celebrate the ability to be certain, draw safe boundaries and go forth knowing I’m the one for the job.

Are there areas in your life that you see a pattern in the way you respond? In the way you handle situations? How much do you allow those in the cheap seats to affect your confidence/decisions/attitude/personal value?

Take some time to reflect! There is potential for all of us to celebrate these moments of doing something different together!

Big Hugs,

Tess Faust